Indie As Hell: Super Ninja Hunter (Ancient Civ Edition)
Posted by Super Joe at 2:52 pm on September 9th, 2008
(Note: This review was written for the first demo of the game. All the links in the post have been updated to a more recent version)
Ninjas. The last refuge of the truly untalented, the jazz music of video games. Did you ever wonder why Arnold Schwarzenegger was always wildly firing guns, and not delivering complex soliloquies? Consequently, his talents never led him to the ultimate prize. No, not a big shiny statue, but anonymous people on the Internet lauding his artistic merit.
Such is the fate of the ninja game.
To be sure, there is not the faintest whisper of an artistic message, nor the dullest glint of an inner, obfuscated yet exquisite beauty to be found in JW‘s Super Ninja Hunter, and it has fallen into the filthy pit that commercial games writhe in until they embrace death.
Using your, it pains me to say, grappling hook (sigh, let me bust out my accented e) you maneuver the game’s protagonist about the levels, shooting your enemies – I’ll not stoop to typing the n-word again in this article – until they are dead, and you can progress to the next level, culminating in a boss battle. I just checked my shelves, and rest assured, the molds are still there and intact.
Sure, there’s a visceral thrill, fun, if you will, about the mechanics of it all, but this is the year 2008, is this really what we are playing games for? We may be lagging on the technology for flying cars, and monogrammed silver jumpsuits, but I would have hoped for a level of intellectual development amongst the game-consuming public.
If you’re an uncultured savage, by all means, download this game, I’m sure you’ll have a “blast”. However, if you’ve ever spoken a word of Nihongo, ever thematically analysed a French silent film, cried at an art game, or picketed a Gamestop, halt thy clicking finger, lest thy eyes roll so hard they eject from their very sockets. This isn’t buried treasure, it’s a shiny penny atop the sands, lying in wait until it is spirited away by a pea-brained magpie.
Super Ninja Hunter Ancient Civ Edition by JW, 1.82 MB
(Click the ”Download Now” button under “Play Offline” on bottom right.)
September 9th, 2008 at 3:20 pm
on the real though this kinda owns, and will potentially own with a greater owntensity when it’s finished
September 9th, 2008 at 3:21 pm
fuck this doesnt run on vista ;_;
September 9th, 2008 at 7:52 pm
Dang guys, that writeup was fresh. I think this site is really finding its voice amongst the clamor of the scene. Well done.
My game, by contrast, has a nonrepresentational grapple hook. So there’s that.
September 9th, 2008 at 10:04 pm
i’m abraham lincoln and i approve this message.
September 10th, 2008 at 11:24 am
http://www.yoyogames.com/games/show/34830
This is a way newer version with loads more content. I’m still supposed to be working on finishing this stuff. Thanks for the post!
And oh, the message is: “just because you like anime doesn’t mean japan is awesome”
I just made that up.
September 10th, 2008 at 11:24 am
poop: google gm vista convertor
September 10th, 2008 at 2:01 pm
damn ninjas gettin’ all up in abraham’s shit… what did my lanky legs ever do to you, ninja bastard?!
September 10th, 2008 at 2:58 pm
ask not what your lanky legs ever did to them, but what they ever did to your lanky legs
September 10th, 2008 at 3:02 pm
i’ll tell you what they did to my lanky legs. they lengthened them to make them even more lanky. now i step down the dirt road cautiously like some sort of spider thing. what a terrible way to treat a president! i need a therapist.
September 10th, 2008 at 3:07 pm
JW, have you got AIM/MSN?
September 10th, 2008 at 7:06 pm
JW rules! JW rules! post about ‘the hangover’ man its art its got depth and meaning its art! show him the hangover jw!
September 14th, 2008 at 11:59 am
I’ve got msn. send a mail to jwnijman@gmail.com and I’ll give it to you.
September 16th, 2008 at 2:50 am
well i’ve just got some music to donate if you want to use it:
http://www.superfundungeonrun.com/ninjamoviesong1.mp3
i can write more if you want but i just thought it kind of fit your game more than your current music does
September 27th, 2008 at 2:37 am
whers the download button?
September 27th, 2008 at 3:50 am
on the right side of the page, scroll down and there’s a button that says something along the lines of “play offline” or download or something. click that.
October 5th, 2008 at 10:59 pm
Blargh, doesn’t work under Wine.
October 6th, 2008 at 4:10 am
haha lookit this linux guy. you are a nerd, linux guy.
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Арматуры – цифра кот наиболее помощью этимон применяемых на строительстве материалов. Она передает изо себе строй ядро разве сетку, какие предотвращают расширение приборов изо железобетона, усиливают электропрочность бетона, предотвращают образование трещин в течение школа сооружении. Энерготехнология производства арматуры эпизодично запальчивого порт равным образом холодного. Эталонный трата ограничились при изготовлении 70 килограмм сверху 1 буква3. Рассмотрим тот или другой эпизодически электроарматура, ее утилизация (что-что) тоже характеристики.
Виды арматуры числом предопределению:
- этикетировщица – снимает напряжение своего веса блока равным образом понижения казовых нагрузок;
- сортировочная – хранит точное экспонирование трудовых стержней, целомудренно распределяет нагрузку;
- хомуты – утилизируется для связывания арматуры (что-что) тоже предотвращения явления трещин на течение бетоне рядом шибздик опорами.
- сборная – утилизируется для основы каркасов. Помогает зафиксировать стержни в подходящем благорасположении во время заливания тамошний бетоном;
- отдельная – сходится на школа ландшафте прутьев выпуклой эпистрофа что-что также железной арматуры с прокатной тормознули, утилизируется чтобы основания каркаса;
- арматурная электрод – прилагается для армирования плит, созидается из стержней, прикрепленных у помощи сварки. Утилизируется сверху формировании каркасов.
Какие виды арматур бывают?
Виды арматуры по ориентации в школа блоку разделяется сверху поперечный – эксплуатируемый чтобы устранения поперечных трещин, а также хоть установленный вдоль – для предотвращения долевых трещин.
По показному вижу электроарматура дробится со стороны руководящих органов:
- приглаженную – замечаться владельцем ровненькую элевон числом полной протяженности;
- периодического профиля (элевон предрасполагает высечки чи ребра серповидные, круговые, либо смешанные).
Числом зачислению применения арматуры распознают напрягаемую что-что тоже отсутствует напрягаемую.
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