Indie As Hell: Treasure Hunter Man

Posted by Mr. Podunkian at 2:11 pm on October 16th, 2008

“A journey of a thousand miles starts with a single step.”

- Confuscius

Free will. Choice. The if-else statements that control the program flow that is the human existence — a program that ultimately ends with “return 0;” — a return to naught. To distill the sayings of a character in Hideo Kojima’s Metal Gear Solid 4 — to boil it and extract the pure meaning of the dangerous poison of the Kojima Frog — one can become ten. Ten can become one hundred. But zero? A zero cannot become a one.

Bernie’s Treasure Hunter Man is a wonderful gamepiece in the Octacamo-ian guise of a petty game about treasure hunter. The main character, Marvin, or shall I say, MArviN (Note the capitalized letters for they reveal my gambit), must embark on a journey of a thousand miles — or at least, a couple thousand kilobytes — a journey full of peril, adventure, and above all, treasures. The role of treasure in this game plays the same role as it does in Passage (an oft cited game in academic gamepiece circles) — mere distractions from our inevitable returning of 0.

Treasure Hunter Man starts with the birth of MArviN — his descent from the heavens and crash landing on an alien world — Port Kruz. Here he is given a binary choice, two roads diverging in a yellow wood; the leftward path — a path off a cliff; and a rightward path; the path of progress.

I’ll not beat around the bush; I am a thinker; an iconoclast; I oppose the flow of the mainstream and choose to swim upriver to its source — the origin of meaning — the spring of the free thought. As such, I made a choice that reflected my attitudes — a destructive choice, to be sure — one that lead me off the ledge of reason and into the chasm of the unknown.

I went left.

The screen did not scroll — there was no hidden room at the foot of that pit, just the absense of level data — NULL, personified.

But the Game was not Over.

I continued to fall. Surely such an obvious folly could not have simply been an oversight on Bernie’s part. No. This was purposeful. There was intent behind this action. I sat in wait, staring at the screen, for a minute, then for ten minutes (I did not have the patience, nor stamina, to wait 100 minutes, sadly), waiting for a glint of change, but there was none. Two roads diverged in the a yellow wood (the wood flooring of the first level, is in fact, brown) — and I chose the one less travelled. And contrary to Frost’s depiction of this scenario, it did not make a difference in the world — the world continued — unchanged — unmoved. It did not even bat its metaphorical eye.

Now you are probably clamoring “How dare you write dismiss an entire game on behalf of a single bug?”

Bug? There are no “Bugs”, in life. The “Bugs” that inhabit your garden, for example, are not some oversight by our Holy Programmer — they are intentional and integral to the program of Life (not to be mistaken with the famous Game of Life, which is a shoddy portrayal at best). This gamepiece is a statement on choice, the permanence of human folly. There is no Game Over; no Continue. You cannot Save nor Load. The journey of life starts with a single step, but know this — the wrong first step will cut your journey quite short indeed!

Treasure Hunter Man (Direct Link) by Bernie, 4 MB

206 Responses to “Indie As Hell: Treasure Hunter Man”

  1. Liam Says:

    Truly, one does this, and must know, that the words above speak only what we hold true, as that nothing is not intended.

  2. Sergio Says:

    Wow… Bernie is a genius.

  3. GirlFlash Says:

    the trick is to see beyond the choices presented to us, I myself chose to stand perfectly still

  4. Anonymous Says:

    I think the most artistic choice is not playing the game as it was ment to be played. But rather use the game to invent some hidden meaning that was not ment to be there in the first place.
    All in the sake of being artistic and pretentious.
    So for instance, I chose to load the game, express a simple “meh” and then press escape.
    By that I have expressed my need for escapism and my dissatisfaction with life’s meaninglessness in general.
    I don’t even like games, I just like to be an artist.

  5. !CE-9 Says:

    well, I choose to go down in style.

    if my life ends, I’m gonna return an dangling pointer (and possibly corrupt the heap beforehand).

  6. poop Says:

    I actually tried playing the game but gave up because your character is really slow 5/10

  7. Mr. Podunkian Says:

    yeah lets give a numerical score to a game you played for probably a minute at most hur hur hur. if you had stuck with a few seconds longer you wouldve gotten the running ability which basically cancels out what you’ve just said. 1337/10

  8. Loge Says:

    I heart THM. And the music is beautiful (anyone happen to know the composer(s)?)

  9. poop Says:

    wait you have to actually earn the ability to run thats p dumb sorry

  10. poop Says:

    also im a big gay impatient baby doopy doop poop

  11. Earnest Says:

    Hey poop! And super joe!
    Stop using gay as a swearword. Really you’re just being homophobes then.

  12. Mr. Podunkian Says:

    ,.-^~*And the World Lived Acceptingly Ever After*~^-.,

  13. poop Says:

    mr poDUMBkian.

  14. Super Joe Says:

    Hey Earnest. You’re gay. That’s just the way it’s going to be.

  15. Earnest Says:

    That’s right. All indies are gays.

    Even you?

  16. SkateboardFace Says:

    Don’t use gay as an insult because it might make some people feel bad? Yeah, I guess insults are supposed to make people feel good about themselves.

  17. Anonymous Says:

    Pretentious Indie Gays Scene

  18. Earnest Says:

    @ Anon
    FTW!

    But seriously though. It is just as discriminating as using ‘nigger’ as an insult. So grow up joe.

  19. poop Says:

    get out earnest

  20. poop Says:

    make a new update podunkian

  21. poop Says:

    here I found a pretentious game for you to review http://iandallas.com/games/swan/

  22. Gay I. Joe Says:

    Hey Earnest, gay does not mean homosexual, you twat. So yeah, all indies are gay and joyful.

    And I am twatphobe. I hope they feel discriminated, because twats deserve being discriminated.

  23. Straight Says:

    I am not gay.

  24. JW Says:

    hey pigpeople, when will we get some more deliciously pretentious news?

    and btw, using nigger and gay as an insult is different.
    fag however, could be compared to gay

    yadadada

  25. Super Joe Says:

    well i was going to review the jetlag but then we found something that touches upon the hot button issue of gays

    make a game about the gays, jw

  26. poop Says:

    someone should make a muslim massacre but with gays that would be p. funny

  27. poop Says:

    godhatesfags.com

  28. Anonymous Says:

    A real indie doesn’t accept requests.

  29. Earnest Says:

    http://www.resist.com/racistgames/playassbandits/assbandits.htm

    Here’s your game poop

  30. poop Says:

    lmao

    hey JW release 1800 zombies already plz tia

  31. Mr. Podunkian Says:

    earnest seriously and unironically shut the hell up

  32. poop Says:

    update this blog plz tia

  33. JW Says:

    hey this halloween

  34. Earnest Says:

    @ Mr. Podunkian
    You are right. I’m shouting at people who are not listening anyway.

  35. poop Says:

    get out earnest!.

  36. haowan Says:

    what a fag Earnest appears to resemble

  37. JW Says:

    Its out sirs and sirettes.

    Because we are so indie here is the yoyogames link:

    http://www.yoyogames.com/games/show/58194

    so bad that it’s indie

  38. poop Says:

    that game rules 5/5

  39. Bob Says:

    He is possibly my favorite indie game developer.

  40. roger Says:

    goddamn faggot niggers

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